Disturbia (Open)

[AVEIRA STERLING]

Was she his mother now? That wasn't going to happen. Carter looked up to her, PJ looked up to her, Alistair trusted her, Yuzki loved her, and so many more. Too many people. Too many. Maybe it was because he had given her a taste of her future madness, but everything was getting under her skin. Sure, she had been kind to all of them. Kind to Hikaru. That's what she did. Kind to everyone, no matter the circumstances. Try to ignore all the dark thoughts in the back of her head.

Which only dug her deeper. She was going to hurt so many people when she snapped. But whatever. She had to focus on the present. If she kept thinking about the future, she would drive herself to the padded room all the faster.

He was asking if she was angry, telling her not to lie. What would she tell him? Even with the ever-growing darkness, she couldn't lie to him. "I'm a little mad, yes. But not at you. I tend to stay a little aggravated constantly. It keeps me on my toes." She smiled as she looked back at him. He wouldn't see it, but maybe he could feel it. "We're approaching the Ringmaster now. So take a deep breath and calm yourself." Now that she was thinking about it.... his and the Ringmaster's power were extremely similar.

[ALISTAIR PYREWICK]

Just as the grand circus had been established it seemed that it was once more ready to disappear. It had been less than a week since the proud tent was pitched and already it was time for departure. The night grew older as the circus within it started to die. Lights were being killed, buildings were reduced to nothingness. A train reared in the distance, eager to consume to shell of the lively fairgrounds. Yet, amidst the process of decay, there was a sense of liveliness. Oddities that belonged to the circus were bustling to and fro from all ways. Never once was there a moment of rest for practically anybody... Except, of course, for the ringmaster himself.


On the absolute edge of the northernmost border was an ornate tent that had yet to be taken down. It wasn't going to go down either until it was absolute last minute. The resident inside not only sheltered himself away from oddities but also had an eon's worth of bills and legal documents. Without stress, a fluid feather quill stroked intricate calligraphy onto the paperwork, decorating the otherwise bland sheets with high class. A silk glove was wrapped around the shaft, which matched the color of the creature behind the utensil. White as alabaster was this man. His creamy crimson eyes calmly analyzed the work cut out for him, not phased despite the mounds of money demanded. Not only was the color of emotion drained out of him but the color of his physical being as well. His unnatural appearance was the result of his curse. Alistair Pyrewick, the leader of this circus, was in fact the Bogeyman himself.

Despite his thirst and source of energy deriving from the delicious fear of children, Alistair was quite simply a soft spoken gentleman. His alarming stare and blank nature was foreign to him. Everything he had ever done was out of purely good intention. That was just his nature. Because of his aspiration to only bring good to the world, he was terrified of tossing everything he knew into discord. Alas, the man has locked himself away, avoiding human/non-human contact as much as possible.

That was, until a 'Ms. Sterling, enter as you please' was heard.

Alistair didn't /mind/ visitors. He just preferred that they were his personal staff. Aveira was one of his most trusted allies. Of course she could enter when she wanted. Quickly yet gracefully Alistair straightened himself up, his silk gloves dusting off his expensive suit pants. He eased back his shoulders and leveled his chin as he readied for his staff.

"Do come in." He commanded in a bland voice, tinged with the wonder of what she had to say.

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[AVEIRA STERLING]

Okay. Ringmaster time. Aveira entered at his command, looking back only once to make sure the boy was keeping up. "Good evening Alistair." What could she tell him? If she didn't word it very carefully, there was a chance that he would get upset. Though, now that she thought about it...she had never really seen him mad. Not since Yuzki got drunk at least. No, it was always disappointment. And that stung so much more than anger.

"This man is a new oddity. He accidently used his power on another oddity. When his eyes are unbound, he creates living nightmares in those he's focusing on. It begins with simple things, and steadily grows worse." Hopefully the poor girl was okay. He hadn't stopped with her, and most didn't have the strength Aveira did. "I brought him to you, he wishes to join the Circo so we can help him with his power."

[HIKARU MINAMINO]

Light taps came from where Hikaru swept the cane, using it to search for uneven flooring or “landmarks” that he could use to maneuver around. Once the circus moved, Hikaru was going to have hell learning where everything was again...but it would be worth the trouble once his mission was complete. Besides, it'd do well to convince the members of the circus that he couldn't do much damage. After all, how much trouble could a blind man who was afraid of himself be?

“She-she had such a beautiful voice,” said Hikaru, “I wanted to see what she...I thought that maybe I could control it for awhile.”

The young man sighed.

“Has there ever been someone with the same, um, condition?” he asked, “What do you do to help them?”

The Ringmaster would be the wealth of knowledge for the circus and all its workings. It was important for Hikaru to get on the man's good side.

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[ALISTAIR PYREWICK]

With the arrival of Aveira came yet another newcomer into his circus. Alistair bowed his head in respect to his chief of security, mumbling a soft "Good evening, Miss Sterling.". His crimson eyes then flashed up from under his mop of curly colorless locks towards the newcomer. The first aspect about him he noticed was the fact he was blind. Did this imply... Perhaps he would not be frightened by Alistair's aura. "A warm welcome to you, sir. May I have the honor of knowing your name?"

[/i] He asked in a refined manner. In his slow fashion he looked back to Aveira, never blinking. It was simply an unnecessary action for him.

With an intent ear Alistair listened to Aveira's explanation, as well as the man's details. He... Had the power of nightmare wreaking. Just like him. His blindness was a facade for his deadly power. His power was one of regret and self anguish. No one should be cursed with his ability. Absolutely no one. Though the two possessed several differences in their actual creation, such as Alistair actually being a true monster, they did share the same gift that brought them the most grief.

Following his deep thinking process an actual emotion struck his face. Though subtle, Alistair barely seemed like he felt true remorse for the man. A pinch of sorrow feel upon his eyes as a faint frown snuck upon his lips. He was afraid of his own potential, this was certain. Alistair, though, could not feel any sort of legitimate fear. Of course he possessed doubts and paranoias, but he knew that he could not feel entirely afraid... To a certain extent. Perhaps he could use this to his advantage when assisting the young man.

"Hush, you need not to explain." Alistair cooed a small 'shh' in a sickly sweet voice, placing a gloved finger upon his powder colored lips. With a deep inhale Alistair proceeded to flip through his list of options in how he could respond to this man. Would he tell him his ability? Certainly not. The boy did need to know exactly the sort of empathy Alistair had for him. "Yes. I do believe from what I have heard thus far that I myself share a curse similar to yours."[/i] Alistair whispered in a gasped breath. The man's other question had caught him by surprise. Could he answer this one? What could the Ringmaster possibly say to him. The truthful answer seemed to be the most realistic.

"I do not know."[/size][/blockquote][/font]

[HIKARU MINAMINO]

Through Aveira's hallucinations, Hikaru had witnessed that Alistair wasn't much older than himself – unless he was an immortal, or something of that type. A few hours ago, Hikaru had believed vampires were myths until he saw the security woman's love for one in their shared visions. He wouldn't be surprised if Alistair revealed himself to be part unicorn at this rate. Still, unicorn or not...Hikaru tried not to vomit on Aveira as the ringleader cooed.

“Hikaru Minamino,” he said. Even though he shuffled up to the desk nervously, Hikaru carried himself with the royalty of a prince: squared shoulders, an elegant posture, and a chin that tilted upward with honor. If the bandages hadn't been wrapped around his eyes, they most likely would've been glinting with determination.

But one merely had to look at his knees, still shaking and knocking together, to know that he was still shocked from the earlier events.

“I need to get it together,” he thought miserably, “I don't know what's real and what's not.” How much fear was he pretending to have? How shaken up was he really? What was part of the mission and what wasn't? He'd barely infiltrated the place and he was already confused! Not a good sign for the first day!

Inwardly, he reasoned with himself that there would be no need for him to hold the gaze of anyone for the rest of the mission. If someone caught him with his eyes open, he'd simply shut them before too much damage would be done. Nobody else would need to go insane like siren...or come dangerously close like Aveira.

When Alistair mentioned they “shared” a curse, Hikaru started paying attention. His jaw dropped. He didn't know what to...how to...he wasn't alone? “You have an evil eye?” he asked, “Why haven't I heard of you before? I would've read something on the news and recognized a pattern of...accidents similar to mine.”

The moment Alistair admitted to not knowing the cure for their curse, Hikaru's excitement fizzled out like a firecracker dud. “If you can't help me...and I can't help anyone in your circus...why did your security woman drag me here?” he said, “Not that I'm not thankful for your help, but...if you share my gift, then you'd know why I don't want to be here in the first place.”

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[AVEIRA STERLING]

Aveira looked up then, her red eyes narrowing dangerously. Not that it mattered. The object of her glare was blind, and she had yet to kill anyone. Soon though, with all the practice she got. "I did not drag you, Hikaru. I wouldn't dare." She didn't want to know what the man did in his spare time. She really didn't. "And the Circo does not /cure/. There is nothing to cure. We teach control, which you lack. Many people come to us in your position, and we help them the best we can." Okay, so maybe the word cure was a trigger for her. Really, anything that implied that she was not normal, whether direct or not, tended to put her in a pissy mood. It wasn't really her fault though. When one lived with the constant fear of losing themselves, they needed to latch onto any normalcy. "And you would do well to remember it. Alistair has learned control, as have I, and many others of the Circo. With work, you will to."

She wanted to move behind Alistair, to his left where she normally stood, but she did not dare. He actually responded to this oddity, yet another one that tested every bit of her control and patience. If she snapped and even yelled at him, she did not want to be near the Ringmaster. "You carry a heavy burden, but it does not have to be a curse."

[ALISTAIR PYREWICK]

Alistair glanced at Aveira as if he were searching for an answer. Hikaru had misunderstood him. Perhaps he would understand that they had similar worries and fears, though there was a chance that he would just get irritated at the fact that he wasn't very close to him ability-wise. "Mister Minamino, allow me to explain..." Alistair sat up straighter as he attempted to recollect his thoughts. What would he say? There was a certain voice in his head that told him to only explain the bare minimum necessary. That was what he was going to do.

"I do not have an evil eye like you."

[/i] Alistair began in an unsettling whisper. "However, my ability surrounds around the fact that I can induce crippling terror in my... Prey."[/i] Was that a good way to explain it? Alistair prayed to himself that he would understand. "I have forbidden myself from sparing the details of this power. It extends much more than merely unsettling people when they enter my office."[/i] Alistair sighed softly as he explained. He glanced once more to Aveira, her presence alerting him somehow to cease his rambling.

"My curse is simply that, a curse. I have tried and succeeded at control, though my methods may not be the most desirable." This statement was true. Why would anybody cooling themselves up constantly in a dark room assist or serve as a proper method of treatment. "It has taken me quite some time to ponder my situation and best adapt my lifestyle for it. You must to that to yourself, Sir Minamino. Your fears are justifiable and your solution is unfortunately something I myself would have done." Alistair then sighed at his pathetic reassurance. He could do nothing for this man the more her realized it.

There was one more aspect that he could use to reassure the blind man, however. "Everyone here is theoretically loyal to the law that each and every oddity must be open, willing to understand, and accepting of their fellow peers. I am sure there are a numerous sum of oddities here that will want to be your friend despite their knowing of their power. Some, such as I, have no concept of outside fear. The humans here are less fragile and delicate than what you may be accustomed to. They may assist you in personal enlightenment as well as self awareness. This of course depends on who you associate yourself with." This was true for Alistair. Though they are paid to do so, he had staff that knew and presumably accepted him for the monster he was. He hoped that Hikaru would find that for himself. [/blockquote][/font]

[HIKARU MINAMINO]

“All I'm saying is if you had a cure, I'd take it,” he snapped, “And if you could get me to control this thing – without more blindfolds – I'd take that too. I'll take whatever you got.” What did this Aveira woman know about the burden of his gift? She didn't have to live in constant fear of hurting other people – heck, she just had to be concerned about herself as far as Hikaru understood. “I want a better solution,” said Hikaru, “Because one day, closing my eyes might not be enough to stop it.”

Surely, the Ringmaster could understand Hikaru's fears. They both possessed an entity inside of them – although in different forms, Alistair's being an actual, physical creature. That entity regularly overpowered its host, testing to see if it could overthrow the mind of its current keeper. From what Hikaru could tell, his ability had a personality of its own. “It” didn't like structure or restraint, nor did it appreciate the little control Hikaru had over it. “I'm a sitting duck,” he said bitterly, “I'm just waiting for this...I don't even know what to call it...This thing keeps getting stronger, likes it's trying to take over!”

That was why he'd even taken on the mission in the first place. While his own situation seemed hopeless, understanding the ways of other “oddities” could help future sufferers of conditions like his own. The government had money – heck, they could pull together the United Nations to come up with some multi-billion dollar program designed to assist those like himself. Hikaru believed, with all his heart, that the government could provide the support necessary to help people globally. Seriously...how much “help” can a circus in Wisconsin provide when its own Ringmaster couldn't find a satisfying solution himself?

“What did you do to control your power?” he asked, “This is how I 'adapted' to my situation and to be frank, I don't think it's going to last long.” Hikaru sighed and took a breath, trying to calm himself down. It wouldn't do any good to keep panicking and...well, yelling at the people trying to help him.

“When I was younger, my ability wasn't strong enough to do the damage it does today. In high school, it started to act out on occasion. Now, I have to blindfold myself to stop it. It's getting worse and worse, like a disease. Self awareness isn't going to cut it for me. I really am searching for a cure. Not friendship or family. Something that can help me before it's too late.”

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[AVEIRA STERLING]

((I think Aveira's done here for now.))

[ALISTAIR PYREWICK]

It was quite apparent that this man wanted a straight forward answer. Unfortunately, Alistair had no idea how to give him one. When his... Monster was released, he tried to muster an ounce of human sanity to keep it at bay. The creature itself was disgusting. It truly was a horrifying beast. Alistair himself was sickened by what he could become. He wanted nothing more than to cleanse his body of that thing and just not have a genuine fear in the world. He was worried if his circus would ever fall, or he would lose his family. But that's it. Worried, not scared. It wouldn't happen. It couldn't happen... Right?

In other words, Alistair knew exactly how he felt. They both took odd measures to prevent themselves from injuring or scaring someone else. Or at least that was how it appeared to be. Alistair kept his methods secret. The only thing he liked to admit to himself was that his method was just like Hikaru's- shutting himself down. This of course meant that Alistair could do absolutely nothing for this poor man. All he could do is hope he understood.

"Please believe me when I say that I understand how you feel. I sincerely do. I suppose... Alistair struggled to find words for himself. "I suppose what will work for you will be found through trial and error. My power, I have found, is best left suppressed. I do not want it to be this way, but like you I have found no other way of controlling myself. I am truly a monster in more than one sense of the word." A tone of faint sorrow touched his hushed yet ominous voice. Alistair wished he could do something to help the boy. He truly did. Unfortunately for Alistair, his own monster fought the other side of his mind, waiting for the most open of weaknesses. He couldn't afford to experiment with himself. "I apologize from the bottom of my heart that I cannot do anything for you personally. I do not want you living in paranoia of your potential as I have." He looked at Hikaru with hazed crimson eyes. Hopefully he would understand.

"I do not want you to hurt others here, though I do know it is unfair to modify your living to suit the needs of others. I am truly sorry for everything you have gone though in your life, but there is absolutely nothing I can do to help. I can only offer you a safe place for you to live amount others who feel just like you. I hope your power does not get worse, nor does it prove incurable."

[HIKARU MINAMINO]

Empty promises, pats on the shoulders, pitiful words from downright pathetic creatures – that's all anybody could ever offer him. Where were the answers? The resources? Was there anybody in the world that could help people like him? “Are you happy living this way?” he asked, “How can you...how can you just give up?”

Hikaru gripped the edge of the desk and leaned in close; even if he couldn't see Alistair, perhaps the Ringleader could see the emotion in the young man. His arms shook as he held onto the edge of the desk, as if his whole world was spinning. The same lips that had spoken with such passion, such hurt...they pulled into a tight line. “I can't accept a future like this.”

Ever since he was younger, the use of his power would send him into an emotional hurricane; he was being flung around at the mercy of the wind. How dare this man say he was “helping” others when he was a coward! At least Hikaru had tried to understand the way his powers worked – albeit at the expense of foster families, classmates, and government workers. “Isn't there anybody out there looking for answers?” he asked, voice growing softer, “Are we just going to hope for the best? Isn't there...anything at all we can do? That we can try to do?”

Hikaru could see the importance of his mission now. It was clear to him that the government wanted to help people in his situation. But with all these supernatural beings living in secrecy, how would they get necessary information to come up with cures if Oddities refused to cooperate? He could see his purpose in full: he'd be the bridge for a new world, one where Oddities and humans could coexist without fears. Every Oddity could live to their full potential without fear, and of course, rightfully assume their placement on a power hierarchy.

“Shouldn't you be...worried? How can you be calm around someone who can make entire towns go insane if their blindfold slips? Why aren't you afraid of me?” Hikaru asked. His voice quivered and shook, reflecting his own upset emotions. “I'll accept your offer to stay. Thank you. I-It's probably safer to live where people know about my ability so they'll be more careful. I'm sorry for causing such a fuss. I just...I pity the both of us, and everyone in our position. We shouldn't be afraid of ourselves because of what we can do, yet we are. It's awful. It's just awful.”

He sighed.

"I usually get a little shaken after I open my eyes," he added, "It's nothing personal."

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[AVEIRA STERLING]

This little get together was all kinds of insightful. Maybe the childish boy was useful after all. Still, it mildly hurt. There Alistair was opening up in his own way to someone that wasn't her. It bothered her. A lot. He was even showing /emotion/.

And it mildly pissed her off. But, really, what didn't? Her patience got thinner and thinner with every memory she absorbed, those voices getting louder and louder. But did she hide with her tail tucked between her legs? No. She had learned to live with her power and was learning to control it. Every second of every day she fought against the insanity, and every second of every day she won. These were children in front of her. Scared of their own potential, scared of the darkness inside them.

And that very fear was what /gave/ the darkness power. Circles, endless circles. Humanity was forever trapped in circles.

"Maybe the Ringmaster can not help you, Hikaru, but I will do my best to. Along with myself, I know two others who have inner demons they've learned to command. Maybe they will be able to help you." Yuzki was one. He had learned to control his monster, and while still in the process of doing so, he had been making amazing leaps and bounds. He had fed, for the very first time that she was aware of, without killing. If anyone could teach him control, it was the vampire.

And Carter. Maybe Hikaru would connect better with the cat-boy, who's own emotional trauma would possibly help him deal with his own.

And her, of course. If anyone could put up with the child's nightmares, it was her. She just needed a little more practice.

"There are always options. Your power works on fear and by fearing it you are only making it stronger. I will help you, Hikaru. And by the time you leave Circo, you won't need your bandages."

[ALISTAIR PYREWICK]

Alistair chose to ignore the barrage of questions and accusations thrown towards him. It was rare that someone questioned his motifs outside of himself. This boy was right with everything. Why was he born into such a high position of power and monstrosity if he had such a loose grasp on both. Trickling across his blank face suddenly was a small grimace, as his mind started to contort with the thoughts of his failures as the ringmaster. Temptation creeped inside of him to reach up and cover his ears while telling the boy to go away. He couldn't, though. He was a man, not a child. He kept a stoic appearance while looking at Hikaru. Maybe letting him inside the circus wasn't the best idea after all.

At the topic of his worry, Alistair looked up with a newly paved emotionless face. With a small inhale and a quick blink, he stated with the most precise tone "I get paid to have confidence in everything.". Proceeding that he stood up to reveal his relatively puny stature. He walked over to Hikaru, standing a few feet before him. "Hikaru, I will tell you exactly what I honestly can do. My occupation is to run this circus, make sure my residents do not kill each other, sign documents, and pay bills. I am just a figure head. I wish I could have a cure for those ashamed of their potential. This place however is mostly a sanctum for those with oddities that set them apart from normal humans. Everyone of us is different. Those who have come to terms with themselves have left the circus and carried on with their lives. Those still here are still learning. The cure for you is not possible. No, I do not have an answer for it, but the very least I can do is give you refuge. Is that okay?" Alistair explained hurriedly, his system nearly out of breath. Aveira had aided him with his explanation, which gave him a nod in return. "Whether you want a cure, an aid, a sympathizer, or a new way to hold back your tempations, I am sure you will find something here. I would be more than happy to aid you in anything you desire, just so long as it is reasonable." He agreed in a much more relieved aura.

His relief rapidly melted into sorrowful sympathy, though the appearance of that was hardly visual. "It is unfortunate how we must hide from society rather than embrace it... Many here have been evicted, abandoned, and shunned to the point of running away. Everyone here is different in that sense, so much so that in the end we are all the same." He concluded as he retreated back to his desk.

From the corner of his eye he looked at Hikaru and smiled ever so faintly. "It is no trouble, Hikaru. Believe me when I state that I have seen much worse."